Another Great Wise Saying

Money can't buy you love, but it can buy a lot of other stuff.

Great Wise Saying

Money can't buy you happiness, but it can afford you a lot of fun.

Insulting Compliment of the Week

You looked so much younger when you were young.

Elvis in the Multiverse

Slight differences in lyrics from universe to universe:

"Don't be true to a heart that's cruel."

The Muse

I sometimes catch myself staring at this computer keyboard, wondering, "What is this alien device?" I then realize it's a keyboard, and I say, "I must be a musician!" And I compose a poem to prove it, which proves nothing since a poem is not a song, is it?

Caterwaul

Obviously, from cat and wail. Cater apparently meant the male cat. Here's some doggerel to remember caterwaul by:

Caterwaul comes from the male:

it joins together cat and wail.

You can  look it up and see for yourself.

Brief Blog Boasts

As is obvious, I'm posting light entries these days. This pattern will continue till the end of the semester. I'll try to post brief, humorous quips and the like, but experience informs me that most people don't share my sense of humor. I understand. I often don't share it either.

Not Doggerel!

I could hardly imagine a scarcely more proper synonym than the title I finally settled on:

Bearable

To call a polar bear's fur white

is not to be in the light right.

Not a great poem, but at least clever, I say.

Paper

Paper's to write!

Paper's trite?

Yes, to write.

Serpent's Revenge?

The Fall of Man

And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed . . . . upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life: (Genesis 3:14)

(And to Adam, He Said:) In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return. (Genesis 3:19)

The Hebrew for "dust" is "ʿāp̄ār."

By eating dust, is the serpent eating Adam? The word "dust" is the same in both verses.

Film Noir

Deborah Ross, for The Spectator (March 20, 2021), says "Spellbinding: Preparations to be Together for an Unknown Period of Time reviewed" (subscription necessary): 

The premise for the unsnappily titled Preparations to be Together for an Unknown Period of Time is this: a Hungarian neurosurgeon meets a fellow Hungarian neurosurgeon at a medical conference, falls in love, and gives up her shiny life and career in America to be with him in Budapest. They had agreed to meet on one of the city's bridges. He doesn't show. She tracks him to the hospital where he works. He says he's never met her before. And now we are on board. Now we have to know: is he gaslighting her? Is she crazy? How is this going to play out? This is one of those films that has you in the palm of its hand right from the off.

I'd like to see this film, but I'll probably only get to see episodes posted on YouTube.

Opening of a novel

One line: two independent clauses linked with a semicolon:

"I used to think true love would last forever; I now wonder if it ever truly begins."

Two lines: two independent clauses separated by a period:

"I used to think true love would last forever. I now wonder if it ever truly begins."

Shortest Bible Verse - As Heard

"Jesus swept." I thought it had something to do with the cleansing of the temple.

Shortest Bible Verse

"Jesus wept."

God Said:

You can do

what you

want to,

but if you

see

me

coming, you

better run!

-RAZ

Peace of Testament

Isn't today International John 3:16 Day?

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

What? There is no such day? We have a Pi Day, but no John 3:16 Day? Doesn't that sound a little bit irrational?

My brain's so stupid, it smarts to think!

I'm correcting papers, but I'm stymied by a document problem, so I'll just go to bed and see if I'm any smarter in the morning.

Piece of Pi

Isn't today International Pi Day?

The Flood

I already find myself being inundated . . .

Soon to Be Overwhelmed

I am rapidly getting caught up in the semester details, and a lot of these details are flashing by, threatening to rise to a flood that'll drag me under . . .

To Infinity . . .

. . . and beyond!

As already noted, I've finished my cycle of 50 poems. For the next four months, I'll be teaching writing. That will at least keep me sharp on language.

I'll try to write a poem now and then.

The Fiftieth Poem

This is where we lose it . . .

Large and Tiny, Large and Tiny

Beware all large and tiny creatures,

from those that make gunk that dries in the eyes,

all night, like nature's cosmetic features,

to those that spawn one-that-got-away lies,

for this poem makes the fiftieth one

I've torn from the living rock of ages:

each weighs on my mind as many a ton

sprinkled like grains of sand 'cross these pages.

And that's the end. Nothing more. Bye.

Seven and Seven?

The fiftieth batch arrives soon . . .

Seven and Seven, Seven and Seven

Seven and seven are lovely creatures.

They're two perfect numbers, so they say.

But who's this "they" of perfect fact features?

This batch of verse is forty-ninth, today.

One batch more, the morrow, creeps in this place

as fifty, scarce past forty-nine, you see,

from seven times seven is then laid waste.

We further clamber up the poet tree.

A perfect place to go out on a limb!

An Unbearable Blight Upon Being!

Might a steer steer a steer?

Steers, Steers

Steers are doubtless disappointed creatures.

They sense something missing, but don't know why, 

as if one or two essential features 

were gone and left them living out a lie.

But life goes on and on, until it stops,

some predetermined time if you're a steer.

A heavy hammer blow, and one then drops.

One thought control to steer? Not even near.

These were some of the facts of life I learned in my eighth grade math class. I also learned that there were a certain number of insect parts per pound of flour, or somesuch.

Humane Beings

My poems these days are more and more like puzzles.

Humane Beings, Humane Beings

Humane beings are rarest of creatures.

They are found everywhere in short supply,

which is the best of their humane features,

as others would agree in their reply.

Oh, good fruit is a little hard to bear,

when even bears find aught of it around.

That's how we ought to show them that we care:

keep humane beings rare upon the ground.

And I speak as a humane being . . .

Approaching Fifty-Poem Batch

I think this poem is number forty-six, but I have miscounted several times, and like Tom Sawyer's aunt, I'm about to give up the ghost of a chance at counting the correct number.

Many-Featureds, Many-Featureds

Oh, cool are the many-featured creatures,

but cruel are the unaccepting ones,

and futile the antiquated features

beneath the many myriad, secret suns.

These poems that started out an empty batch

now strive for fifty as their final goal,

and short excessive effort, but good catch,

might reach that sparkling effervescent role.

Many of these poems are ridiculous, I realize (and this one's an example), but I'm having fun with the rhymes and images - or ought I say the rhyme and imagery.

Leftfooted Counting Recounted

You have no right to what is left!

Left Feet, Left Feet

We used to be just quadruped creatures,

but slowly developed two well-armed hands.

With two feet left, our left-footed features

are that we gimp and limp across the lands.

Our left side has one foot: left it be.

Look down upon our feet and see bereft:

what is it that we see, what don't we see?

We gasp to see the last alone is left.

This reminds me of the bad directions joke, in which the punchline, at a fork in the road, is: "Take the right, you'll be left; take the left, you'll be right."

Or maybe vice-versa?

Pelicans: Merely Troublemakers?

Pelicans and Publicans, somehow united?

Pelicans, Pelicans

Pelicans are nasty, devilish creatures

that can swallow living rock pigeons whole,

and probably have more cruel features

than a superannuated demon troll,

which proves, I guess, the ugly pelican

(ugly as sin, that base, capacious pouch)

is no less than an abject evil demon

awaiting for that moment best to pounce.

They don't overdo it with currency of money or currents of liquor, do they, those publicans imposing heavy taxes on their drinks?

Rhinostriches Locked Up

Another of Meinong's impossible creatures, but I didn't know he has a chain of zoos!

Rhinostriches, Rhinostriches

Rhinostriches are truly weird creatures.

They fan fannies like hippos in tutus,

but haven't got the really right features.

They belong in Meinong's chain of famous zoos.

I've never seen a rhinost bull or cow.

I must admit, I hope to never see one.

But I can tell you any way or how,

I'd rather see not anyone come be one.

When I was only six or so, there was a girl next door and another across the street who were cousins and played together a lot. They liked the purple cow rhyme and would chant it as we waited for the school bus. This got on the nerves of my older brother (one year older), so immediately after they'd recited the last line, "I'd rather see than be one," he'd retort, "I wouldn't. I'd rather be a purple cow!" That made them so angry. "No, you'd rather SEE one!" they'd insist. I had to laugh.

Au Pair of Hands!

O pair of hands, do help me with this poem!

Pair of Hands, Pair of Hands

A pair of hands are two complete creatures!

But they're not quite completed, are they?

They need all of the body's other features

to be a handsome, handy handful, okay?

Oh, happy are the helpful helping hands

that hurry not in haste, but have huge time,

for they help with the harms and hurts with bands

that hamper not the health, and hold the rhyme.

Untouched by human hands . . .

Polar-iced Place

As Blumenberg might say, work on myth:

Polar Bears, Polar Bears

Polar bears are great monstrous big creatures,

but they don't really live at a pole,

for two great physical force features

result more in a petal-fugal hole.

Or an oblate spheroid called Terra,

spinning tales in the darkness around,

in a life-world we fear to call "Vera,"

where monsters like these bears abound.

And polar bears aren't the earth's only fierce creatures.