Friday, November 28, 2014

Getting into the Spirit of Christmas . . .

Rudolph, the Bloody-Nosed Reindeer
Google Images

Christmas is approaching in all its post-Thanksgiving glory, and what could be more glorious than Rudolph's strobe-flashing nose? Soooo . . . let's take a look at the lyrics of "Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer" and get into the spirit of Christmas:
You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen,
Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen,
But do you recall?
The most famous reindeer of all?
Listen fella, I didn't even recall most of those first eight till you recited them! You sure they're all American? Those names look foreign . . . Anyway, here comes that infamous interloper to tradition now:
Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
Has a very shiny nose
And if you ever saw it
You would even say it glows.
Hard to imagine that a shiny nose actually 'glows'. Shiny, fine, but glows? Well, maybe if this little newcomer was hitting on too much of the eggnog!
All of the other reindeers
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in any reindeer games
And Santa didn't notice this abuse? Or didn't care? Or was some sort of distant paternal figure?
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa came to say,
Rudolph with your nose so bright,
Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?
Oh, so now that he needs that 'shiny' nosed one, the plump elf is all polite and flexible. The other reindeer, too:
Then all the reindeers loved him,
And they all shouted out with glee,
Rudolph the red-nose Reindeer
You'll go down in history!
Hypocrites! What the perditionating infernality are we supposed to gain from this story? What moral lesson does it teach? What are we to tell our kids? That they can ridicule some poor soul to their heart's content, but if they suddenly need that person for some reason, they can just start shouting praises, and all abuse is forgiven?



Post a Comment

<< Home