Here follows a lengthy lecture by Mary Ruefle on lying, which you can also read in Madness, Rack, and Honey (page 264):
What!? You're here already? You must have read too quickly! Go back and read the entire lecture again! Take your time! Think it through!SHORT LECTURE ON LYINGIn this lecture I only lie three times. This is one of them.
To be frank, I misquoted Ruefle's first sentence. She actually wrote, "In this lecture I lie only three times."
You can report my distortions here.