A Crass Act . . .
My new story's coming along slowly, given my sundry and manifold duties, but it's developing. In the scene that follows, the protagonist has just met a mixed Russian-Korean woman who shows him an advertisement that he'd inadvertently contributed to:
For a few moments, engaged with something on her smartphone, Agashka said nothing. I waited, assuming she had received a message, but she then pulled a tablet from her handbag, which I hadn't noticed on the chair beside her till now, and turned it on. With deft fingers, she typed some obscure code, and up came a website presenting a selection of videos. "Which do you want to see first, the ad for Crass or the ad for Hate?"After that, things begin to get interesting . . . I hope.
Astonished, I could manage only a single word: "What?"
"Since you're not choosey," she replied, "let's watch the Crass ad first." She then clicked on an icon labeled "Crass," and as the image expanded to screen size, a weary young Caucasian man appears in a craft beer bar ordering the house beer:
Young Man (obviously thirsty): I'll have a house beer.Agashka and I watched the screen fade to black. "Well?" she asked, clicking "escape" to restore the icons.
Bartender (draws a pint): Here you go.
Young Man (sips, grimaces, complains): This stuff's not cold enough!
Bartender (condescending): This 'stuff' is a fine craft beer. You're supposed to taste it.
Young Man (annoyed): Hey, I don't care for taste when I've got a big thirst. I just want a refreshing kick in the ass!
(door bursts open, in charges Korean pop-music singer Psyched -- singing his world-famous "Gangland Style" with its characteristic lightning-fast punches and high kicks worthy of Carl Douglas in "Kung Fu Fighting" -- and kicks the young man hard in his buttocks, splashing craft beer into the bartender's face)
Psyched (handing a Crass to the young man): Try a kick in the ass! Try Crass!
Young Man (taking a huge gulp, cries out in delight): Now, that's a kick in the ass!
Psyched (laughing): That's Crass.
Initially speechless, I finally managed to locate my voice. "That's a horrible ad!"
"But it's popular," she said.