Sunday, February 05, 2017

Near Literate Scammer!

Finally, someone actually literate is trying to scam me for money:
Greetings Dr. Horace Jeffery Hodges
(Well, almost literate - got my name right, and that's truly unusual, but forgot to add a colon.) Salutations, yourself, Ms. Basargin!
I have instruction from my principal, a business magnate and founder of a Russian company to contact you regarding this business brief.
Your high school principal? Are you old enough to be doing this sort of thing? Your principal, anyway, sounds like a real go-getter! Not only does she run a high school, she's a magnate (thus attractive, presumably), and even the founder of a business! So . . . what is this "business brief"?
We are planning to shift investment from Russia to other countries because of the recent sanctions on Russia due to the government decision on Ukraine, Syria, MH17 Malaysia plane shoot and other matters. My principal is moving funds from his present portfolio to invest outside Russia.
These points weren't especially brief, but they do sound like good reasons for a business to get out of Russia. I gather you need my expertise in this process and will be paying me an outrageous sum of money. Make your offer!
Your partnership is required to cooperate with us to move this funds for this investment into your country. You will be of immense assistance to us in the investment and you will be rewarded on percentage share.
Hmm . . . serious grammar slippage there in "this funds" - but even worse, you're offering a mere "percentage share"?
Please indicate your interest and get back to me for more details.
Okay, here's my interest. I don't want to work at this. Just give me a few million dollars to transfer some huge sum of money through my account in the US to an account set up there for your 'principal'. That's the usual offer made in these unsolicited emails promising compensation for my serving as a middleman.
I wait your response.
Well, you can wait and wait and wait, but I think you mean "await."
Thanks, but no thanks, unless you have a better offer.
So, you're Roman? How romantic! I'm from one of the world's many Salems. That makes me a Salemite, I reckon. Anyway, I want millions, and to get those millions, I'm prepared to wait. I will employ Obama's strategic patience, an approach that has always worked so well . . .



At 8:03 AM, Blogger TheBigHenry said...

"... on percentage share."

The absence of the article "a", as in "on a percentage share" is typical of mistakes made by native Russian speakers. Slavic languages do not include the use of definite or indefinite articles.

At 8:41 AM, Blogger Horace Jeffery Hodges said...

And he (not really "she," as I pretended) does claim to be speaking for his "principal," who seems to be a Russian. The impressive thing is that the fellow got my name right. He went to that much trouble! But he didn't seem to realize that I'm based in Korea and have no special access to a bank account in the US. Of course, they don't care about that anyway since they're actually just trying to scam me for money. They always claim to need some money first in order to get access to the money that they would promise to send to me. The gullible fool who believes this is soon parted from all his money, for there is always another obstacle that requires a bit more money to get past.

Jeffery Hodges

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At 8:49 AM, Blogger TheBigHenry said...

"These scams are often known as 'Nigerian 419' scams because the first wave of them came from Nigeria. The '419' part of the name comes from the section of Nigeria’s Criminal Code which outlaws the practice. These scams now come from anywhere in the world."

At 9:30 AM, Blogger Horace Jeffery Hodges said...

I used to get a lot of emails from those Nigerian scam artists, and I'd ridicule them in blogposts, so they stopped trying to scam me.

Jeffery Hodges

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