Kinky Friedman Robbed of Election!

Kinky Friedman

The Man Who Would Be President
If This Were A Fair World . . .

Wikipedia

I've long been a Kinky Friedman supporter, ever since I heard his song "They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore" while I was studying at Baylor University in Waco, Texas back in the 1970s.

Anyway, a little known fact ('cause the powers that be want it little known) is that he was running for president this year, and my contention is that he won the election, but for various nefarious reasons, nobody knows this except me even though I have tried to raise awareness of the issue over at the Marmot's Hole, starting when the election results had not yet been 'definitively' announced:

I'm still waiting for the Kinky Friedman write-in votes to be counted, and that we've heard nothing yet about those is a real scandal -- and probably a conspiracy -- but once Obama is proved an alien from Kenya and Romney an alien from Kolob, Friedman will step forth to accept the honor of being proclaimed POTUS, our first real Jewish cowboy president from Texas who's even written a novel and will therefore govern with novel ideas!

Nobody responded to that comment of mine because everyone else was screaming abuse at Obama and Romney, so I followed it up with a plea for attention:

Why is the Kinky Friedman vote scandal being ignored?

Since any voter with good sense either checked Friedman's good name or wrote it in and since my fellow Americans are all voters with good sense, then Friedman must have won by a landslide!

Kinky was the only candidate who'd truly protect free speech!

Remember his campaign slogan:

"I always say, you can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends, but you can't wipe your friends on your saddle, so you're stuck with 'em."

That says everything!

Still no response, so I tried again, this time by promoting my own political party:

I consider myself a radical left-wing conservative reactionary independent solipsist trying to build a political party, except none others like me seem to exist . . .

Where are all the other solipsists?

That got a response from a commentator who called himself "Anonymous Joe":

#257 jefferyhodges: "Where are all the other solipsists?"

We stopped thinking about you.

Relieved to have an interlocutor, I replied:

Jeffery Hodges (#257): "Where are all the other solipsists?"

Anonymous Joe (#262): "We stopped thinking about you."

That explains why I haven't felt like myself lately. Cogito ergo sum must be flawed -- or maybe I just need to think harder!

Be that as it may, all other solipsists are invited to join my Radical Egalitarian And Left-wing Conservative Reactionary Independent Solipsist Party, officially acronymed as REAL CRISP!

We support Kinky Friedman, the true winner of this year's presidential election!

After this comment, I received no further response, either from Anonymous Joe or any other commentator.

The conspiracy of silence is far-reaching . . .